Exorcised!

d60fa666fcb5dc71cfe3cfdf7e3a0d53How my mind works is so scary sometimes. I was just poking around my upcoming book when this memory just popped up… thought I’d share it. (The book has nothing about this, which is why it was scary. Where the fuck did this come from?)

I grew up Pentecostal when young and drifted into the unaffiliated charismatic movement in early adulthood before finally going to Catholicism. Charismatics are big into the holy Spirit and its gifts, i.e. laying on of hands for healing, blessing, speaking/singing in tongues, etc.

After being a member since we had started meeting in our homes a small group of them came to me one night. “We have prayed and it has been revealed to us that you are carrying a demon inside you.” <really, I thought it was just a bad burrito> “We are going to cast out this hellhound once and for all.” <at this point they handed me an office wastebasket> “Be careful. When it is expelled into that pail it will still be dangerous. We’ll deal with it then.” <at this point about six burly men and a couple badly dressed women surrounded me, put hands on various parts of my body and began praying in tongues, loudly and vehemently. It got louder and louder, sweatier… I started to feel real bad that nothing was happening to me. I tried my darndest to throw something up, just to make them happy, but nothing. Not even the burrito.> “This one is strong. It will require more prayer and meditation. Go home. Read your bible seeking direction. We’ll try again when the Spirit moves us.”

Gee, for some reason I never went back to that little group.

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